As I get older, I become more aware of how important the ability to freely choose your relations under no external pressure of interaction (such as material reliance) is. I'm also coming to terms with the fact that someone can help you out when you really need it, and they can still not be enough for you or contribute to an environment where you feel limited in other ways. And no amount of "I should be grateful" can wash away resentment from the inability to choose. Granted, there are choices I could make, such as move out right now, but...